Midlife Crisis is a term coined by Eliott Jaques, a psychoanalyst. His research from the late 1950’s and early 1960’s identified that around forty years of age there is a subconscious shift in thinking which may question our purpose or change our approach to life. This is mostly in part to the realization that our youth is escaping us, death is possible, and that we may be closer to death than birth.
Now Hollywood has captured midlife crisis in a negative light making us think that dying your hair, buying an impractical sports car, and seducing the babysitter is normal or even acceptable. This display of the middle-aged male as someone who is scared of change and desperately grappling to their youth is such a disservice to the species. Our society doesn’t make this any easier with false messages aimed at the male ego and shaming methods to accompany it. Many men are fed this idea that inflated macho masculinity is the only way to succeed. You gotta “grow a pair” in order to exhibit strength…Hell No! (Side note: I personally can’t stand this phrase. I’ve seen what happens when a pair gets hit…ain’t nothing strong about laying on the floor in the fetal position.) All this attitude does is expose male insecurities. Keep in mind that vulnerability is courageous and attractive; covering up your insecurities, not so much.
But does midlife have to be a crisis? I like to believe that we can all tap into our resiliency and seek change, making mid-life an adventure. Let’s replace the term midlife crisis with midlife pivot. This is your time to shine! You create your reality. You get to write the next chapter. Act 1 is winding down. Time for Act two. How are you going to show up?
Wing Woman 